Where will people get their first kisses now!?

So every summer there is some article about declining enrollment numbers in summer camps. Blame it on the economy, Xbox or the fact that you now cannot get a college scholarship for sports unless you've been doing it seriously since age 7, but this should be considered a national crisis. Now, maybe I was unique because I am an only child and my parents were deathly afraid I was never going to develop social skills, but I have been going to camps since I can remember for everything from various sports to computer programming (yes, I'm serious. but we aren't in middle school anymore so you cannot make fun of me).

Day camps are a joy, especially for working parents and the counselors get to send the little snots back home around the time the lunch/snack high wears off and they start screaming. I understand that not every parent or child is comfortable sending their children away to sleepover camp but this brings me to my point. A startling number of kids I know had their first kiss/sexual experience at sleep away camp. I also worked at the summer camp I went to and got plenty of action out of it so this issue spans across generations. Now, you may be thinking "why would I send my child away to be turn into a ho ho?" but think of the other places kids get first kisses.

1) A car: Ok, to this day I HATE saying hello/goodbye to a potential lover in a car. You can't actually touch, there's no way to lean in without being painfully obvious and then the girl will inevitably struggle somehow getting out of the car and want to crawl into a corner. Until bench seats make a comeback, this is a major nono.
2) At the door: As I mentioned, I am an only child. This means my mother waited up for me at night. Every night. The only thing worse than an awkward first kiss would be your parents witnessing it. Also, there is the awkward pause when both of you are trying to figure out what to do and what goes where and maybe your drop your keys or you can't find them after the kiss or your dog starts barking or or or!
3) At school: Eh. No. Although, any positive thing you can associate with high school is good. Or middle school. Whatever. But not every first kiss is positive so you know, be careful.
4) A dance: Very public. With people grinding all over each other. If it's in middle school, your best friends are obviously all staring. Awkward.

I'm sure there are a multitude of other options that are cute and everything, but the allure of camp is really that there are no parents involved at all. Most times, the counselors are more concerned with the play they may or may not be getting from each other so you can wander. Camps are also typically in the wilderness so you can wander a bit and hold hands because you are "scared of the dark" or "heard a noise." Then you can gossip to your camp friends about it (and maybe your counselors...) but they won't be there to taunt you forever about it. It's perfect. So, send your children to camp and let them experience first kisses the least awkward way possible. Plus, it'll give you alone time to get some lovin' too.